We were materializing in front of a large desk. A woman who I took to be Chancellor Davies was seated behind it. Behind her and to her right sat a man in a suit.

It was a large, somewhat dimly lit room, with thick curtains on the windows. Everything was plushly upholstered or paneled in wood. There was a separate seating area off to the side, with a huge fire place. Two was sitting in one of the high-backed chairs there, calmly eating a banana.

“Hi, Mack!” she said, as soon as I’d fully materialized.

“Hi, Two.”

“I’m supposed to be in class right now,” she said, a little shakily. There was an oddly triumphant look on her face as she got the sentence out.

“Oh,” I said.

“Miss Mackenzie? I’m Beth Davies, the chancellor,” the woman said. “And I’m so very pleased that Professor Smith managed to find you.”

“Actually, my dear, it was a group of my students who found our wayward student,” Smith said. “I hope that this little incident will do something to mend the perception of delvers among non-human students.”

“It would be nice to have something positive come out of this, yes,” Davies said.

“In any event, dear chancellor, I hope you will excuse me but I really should get back to my office. I have six groups in the maze and nobody is monitoring but a teaching assistant.”

“Of course,” the chancellor said. “You have my gratitude for your role in Miss Mackenzie’s recovery, no matter how small.”

The professor made a low bow and faded out.

“Now, before I say anything else, I’m sure you would rather have this conversation fully dressed,” Davies said. She gestured towards Two. “This young lady was kind enough to bring your clothes from your dorm room.”

“No, I wasn’t. You didn’t tell me to bring her clothes,” Two said. “You told me to bring clothes for her. You did not say they had to be hers.”

I repressed the urge to roll my eyes or groan.

“Whose clothes did you bring, then?” the chancellor asked. She was a little pale. I wondered if her mind was flashing to the fictional depictions of too-literal golems and she was imagining Two taking the nearest suitable garments, regardless of owner.

“Mine,” Two said proudly. “I like them better. She does not have very nice things.”

Chancellor Davies turned towards me, at a loss.

“It’s okay,” I said. “She’s done stuff like this before.”

“Well, in any event, they’re laid out in the washroom over there,” she said, indicating a door recessed in the wall. “Miss Two, if you wouldn’t mind, please go tell your friends that Miss Mackenzie has returned safely.”

“Okay,” Two said, getting up. “I wouldn’t mind.”

She dropped the banana peel in a wastebasket by the desk.

“Take another banana, if you want,” Davies said, holding up the fruit bowl.

“Okay,” Two said, taking the banana from the bowl. Another one appeared in its place.

“Miss Mackenzie?” Davies asked, holding the bowl out.

“No, thank you,” I said. “I’m just going to go get dressed.”

“Bye, Mack!” Two said.

“Bye, Two.”

At least the jeans Two had selected for me this time had nothing stuck to the seat, though bizarrely there were no back pockets. It did have little rhinestones in spiral patterns on the legs, but those weren’t so bad. The shirt had a big butterfly made out of glitter.

Differing styles aside, it seemed like a bad idea for her to keep loaning me clothes like this. I didn’t really like the odds of me managing to get from the administrative building back to Harlowe without losing some of the jewels or wrecking the shirt’s design.

Her jeans seemed to pinch a little bit more than I remembered, or maybe this was just a tighter pair. It seemed unlikely I could have gained enough weight in a week to make a difference, especially since I’d pretty much always been the same size.

There were a pair of butterfly hair-clips with the same blue and green glitter as the one on the shirt, but since Two wasn’t around to insist, I didn’t bother to put them on. I wasn’t exactly sure how to do it properly, anyway.

“I’m sure that feels much… well, a little better,” Davies said, when I came out. I’d had to roll up the legs of the jeans, and the shirt was a bit too long, too. “She’s a bit… different, isn’t she? Miss Two.”

“There’s nothing wrong with her,” I said.

“No, of course not. Please, have a seat. Would you like something to drink? Some food? I can have something sent in.”

“No, thank you,” I said, taking a seat in the plush chair in front of the desk.

“Miss Two was with the first group who showed up, at just past eight,” she said. “They came directly from the healing center, arriving before I’d even finished speaking with the director. I spoke with them, but I’m afraid I didn’t have much to tell them. The others started showing up a little after. We had to move them out of the lobby for safety reasons. At last count, there were over one hundred students protesting for your return.”

“Are you sure all of them were protesting for my return?” I asked.

“What else would they be protesting?”

“Never mind.”

“In any event, I felt it was wiser and safer to speak with you privately first, rather than simply dropping you into the crowd,” Davies said. “That’s why I asked your roommate to wait in here, so that she could let all your friends know you were safe.”

“Why her, in particular?” I asked. It seemed odd to me that Amaranth wouldn’t have insisted on being there. Had Davies picked Two because she was the most tractable?

“There was no shortage of volunteers, but as both your roommate and emergency contact, Miss Two had official status,” Davies said. “When Lynette reported your disappearance, she forwarded the card you’d filled out to change your emergency contacts with a note saying you would not wish us to use your contact of record.”

“Well, she did that much right,” I said.

“Lynette Havilland is a very gifted healer,” Davies said.

I could have said something about healing ability not being a good measure for leadership skills, but it didn’t seem productive. I still wasn’t quite sure why I’d been brought before the chancellor, unless it was simply because this was where the protest was.

“Is Two going to be in trouble?” I asked instead.

“What? Oh, of course not. We try to instill a sense of social consciousness in our students. Sanctioning them for participating in a peaceful protest would seem a little counterproductive,” Davies said. “That, and it always seems to lead to more protests.”

“I meant, for skipping classes,” I said.

“Well, at the rather vocal insistence of a, ah… Miss Stephanie, I think… I’ve taken steps to have Miss Two’s professors excuse her from her classes for the day,” Davies said. “Most professors will probably do the same, and I’m sure we can do something officially to ensure nobody is penalized. Students do disappear rather more permanently from time to time, of course, but in a case when the university itself is at fault…”

“Though fault has yet to be determined in this case,” the man seated behind her quickly said.

“Well, yes, I suppose,” the chancellor said. “This gentleman, Miss Mackenzie, is Leon Arnett, from our legal department.”

I looked at him. “A lawyer?” I asked. He nodded. “Why do you have a lawyer here?” I asked Davies.

“To put it bluntly, you have been wronged,” she said. Arnett cleared his throat, but she held up a hand. “As the highest representative of the institution responsible, it’s my duty to acknowledge that and make some sort of amends. However, I also have a duty to the university. That’s why Leon is here.”

“I’d like to point out that while her regret is no doubt sincere, the chancellor is not empowered to assume responsibility on behalf of the university,” Arnett said.

“Call it a figure of speech,” Davies said. She sighed. “Before I’m slapped with a gag order, Miss Mackenzie, let me just say that I’m deeply sorry for any part the university faculty may have played in your ordeal. We have started an investigation into the healing center’s policies and are issuing a memorandum on the subject of remote magic use.”

“What exactly happened there?” I asked.

“Professor Proust says that ‘infernal interference’ disrupted his spell, but he thought he could ‘power through it’,” Davies said. “I’m sorry to inform you that he did not immediately realize you had left the environs of the healing center, and his subsequent attempt removed your clothing and weapon from the scene.”

“What?” I asked. “He actually kept trying?”

“We’ve circulated a description of your knife and clothes,” Davies said. “I think the odds are very good they’ll turn up within the university grounds. After all, you did.”

“Has anybody stumbled across the bed yet?” I asked.

“Well, ah… no,” the chancellor said. “Not as such.”

“The university is prepared to compensate you for the value of your missing effects,” Arnett said.

“That’s a start,” I said.

“And, of course, we’d be happy to provide you with a temporary replacement so you can meet the weapon policy,” Davies said. “Unless that pitchfork you’re carrying around signifies that you’ve already found a replacement?”

I couldn’t really picture myself carrying the pitchfork around. It was too bulky to take into class and it didn’t really project the sort of image I wanted.

I was definitely not giving it up, though. I felt I needed something to show for my time in the maze, though, and as Smith had said, “finders keepers.” Anyway, it might be worth something. Morally, I couldn’t sell an infernal weapon on the open market, but maybe the diabolism department would buy it from me for study.

“I don’t want to carry a weapon,” I said. “I’m a fierce creature, right?”

“Well, yes, you are technically eligible for that exception,” Davies said.

“Then I want it,” I said. “If I’m going to have people throwing signs at me and warding doors against me because of my race, I might as well get some benefits out of it.”

“We’ll make sure your new ID reflects that status, then,” Davies said.

“And I want it retroactive,” I said. “I got hit with a fifty silver fine for not carrying an accessible weapon, the first weekend here. I want that back.”

“Fifty silver?” Davies repeated.

“That’s the maximum fine,” I said. “And you know, I really think the reason it was that high… and the only reason we were stopped in the first place… is because we were a group of obvious non-humans, on our way to the student union.”

“Well, I think we could agree that fifty silver is a little excessive for a first-time offense and have that ticket canceled,” Davies said.

“Though it should be noted that this is not an admission of bias or responsibility on the university’s part,” Arnett added.

“All things considered, I’d rather have an admission of bias and responsibility than the money,” I said. “Do you have any idea how things really are around here, for the non-human students?”

“While I understand there’s certain… resentments, there’s no policy of harassment or discrimination towards students of any race,” Davies said.

“There doesn’t have to be,” I said. “Everything having to do with race around here is so half-assed. Any intelligent being can attend university, but no efforts are made to actually accommodate us.”

“Well, now, I hardly think that’s fair,” Davies said. “We’ve made a place for students of all races in Harlowe Hall, and appointed a dean to make sure your needs are met.”

“Yeah, you’ve given us a place and appointed a dean, but she seems to think her job is keeping us in our place,” I said. “Like catering in meals instead of addressing the problems in the dining hall. It would be one thing if the meals were more tailored somehow, but do you know what they get for us? Stuff like pizza.”

“Forgive my ignorance, but don’t most people your age like pizza?” Davies asked.

“Humans, not people. Some races can’t eat cheese. Some can’t eat wheat. Some can’t eat any animal products at all. Some of them probably need more meat. Some of them don’t have mouths that are set up for chewing. Can you imagine trying to swallow a piece of pizza whole?” I said. “A mass pizza order’s about the worst thing you could do if you’re trying to accommodate a bunch of different dietary needs. What else do they get? Sub sandwiches… same problem, but at least it’s easier to take one of them apart. Deli trays at least let people build their own, but it’s still pretty hit or miss. I don’t eat the catered food, so I don’t have a lot of examples, but I’m sure it’s all stuff like that.”

“Well, this is rather beyond the scope of what I meant to discuss, but since you’re here and this is on your mind, what would you suggest we do instead?” Davies asked.

“First, make sure the dining hall is accessible to everybody,” I said. “Not just ‘officially’ but in fact. You’ve already got vegetarian options and stuff there, and people can choose what they eat. Take some of the money you’re spending on catering in Harlowe and use it to add more options. More mushrooms. Fresher vegetables. Raw eggs and meat to students who request them… that wouldn’t cost anything, actually, since you’ve already got the items.”

“Raw eggs and meat?” Davies said. “That isn’t safe.”

“For humans,” I said. “Cheese pizza isn’t safe for goblins.”

“Well, this is certainly something to think about,” Davies said.

“And you could get non-human resident advisors,” I said.

“I believe the advisor program recruits from every dorm,” Davies said.

“Like student activities are advertised in every dorm, right? Except they aren’t. The people in charge of things like that forget Harlowe, or don’t think it counts, or are afraid of going near it… and the fact that nothing is ever done about anything like that just makes it seem legitimate,” I said. “You need to make sure the rules are actually being enforced, and that’s not all. Some of the humans are afraid of us, or they don’t consider us people. For me, I can actually understand that… but apparently some people think that way about all non-humans. A bunch of new rules and policies aren’t going to change that.”

“I’m afraid you’re right about that,” Davies said. “So the question is, what would you have us do?”

“This is a school, isn’t it?” I said. “Educate.”

“Well, there are sensitivity programs out there, but they all deal with things like not calling a dwarf ‘Mr. Clan Name’ and not forgetting a gnome is standing there,” she said. “The problem is, there aren’t any that deal with dark elves or goblinoids or… people with extraplanar ancestries.”

“There,” I said. “You’ve identified the problem.”

“Excuse me?”

“I said, ‘you’ve identified the problem’,” I repeated. “So what’s the next step?”

She stared at me in confusion.

“This is a major university,” I said. “You can’t tell me it doesn’t have the resources to create its own… well… resources.”

“I understand you ran for student senate for your floor,” Davies said. “How did that turn out?”

“Tie,” I said. “The vote’s tonight.”

“Forgive my frankness, but I can’t decide if I should hope you win or not,” Davies said.

“I’m not going away, even if I lose,” I said. “This whole stupid thing happened because one person was afraid of me, and another person couldn’t understand that her transgressions were that big a deal. The f… messed up thing is, a few weeks ago I wouldn’t have considered somebody warding against me a big deal, but none of this is happening in isolation. I’ve got friends who look as scary as I am to humans.”

“Well, I honestly wish you luck,” Davies said. She sounded sincere, but her smile had drooped a bit. “However, it would be good for you to bear in mind just how ‘scary’ you are, as you put it. This is part of the reason I wanted to speak to you in private.”

I said nothing, but waited for her to elaborate.

“A crowd of riled up people… non-human or not.. being led by a demon is the sort of thing that can make people justifiably nervous,” she said. “If Professor Smith had delivered you directly into the company outside… well, you seem reasonably calm and in control of yourself. I had to be cautious.”

“What, you thought I might incite a riot?”

“You’d have every right to be angry, but I do have a responsibility to the university,” Davies said. “I’m trying to be forthright with you here, Miss Mackenzie.”

“I prefer Ms. Mackenzie,” I said. “‘Miss’ seems a little degrading.”

“Ms. Mackenzie, then,” Davies said, though it seemed she had to work her mouth or mind around the idea. “I’m trying to be forthright with you. I regret what happened, and promise you a full accounting will be made, but it would be dishonest to pretend I was not apprehensive about your emotional state. Anybody would be upset, but not everybody would have your destructive potential.”

I sighed.

“You’re right,” I said. “But about this ‘full accounting’… I was shot with an arrow in the maze.”

“Yes, Professor Smith mentioned that,” Davies said.

“It was one of his students,” I said. “He didn’t know I was another student, but the whole group was prepared to leave me to die instead of summoning help.”

“Yes, well, unfortunately, by my understanding, they were following the letter of the rules of their exercise,” Davies said. “It’s up to their instructor to exercise whatever leeway he has in their grades, but I don’t believe they can be penalized beyond that.”

“Two of them were talking about killing me when they thought I might have killed a human,” I said.

“Did anybody witness this?” Arnett asked.

“Just the other members of the party,” I said. I sighed. “Look, I know they probably won’t be punished. I just don’t want them getting any medals. I don’t want the headline to be ‘Heroic Student Adventurers Rescue Half-Demon.’”

“I don’t think that will be a problem,” Davies said. I couldn’t imagine it would… it would look better for the university if a professor ended up with the credit. “Is there anything else on your mind?”

“Not off the top of my head,” I said. A tiny little voice in the back of my mind gave me a mental prod. So far, the only mention of money had been for stuff I had actually lost. I’d spent the entire morning wandering around a deadly maze. I could have been turned into a cursed scarecrow thing for all eternity, or until somebody wandered in who didn’t have a cheat sheet. I’d been threatened with death. I felt awkward bringing it up, but I think I was entitled to more than fifty silver and a new knife. “Except, you know… compensation. I think… I think I’m entitled to something. For my suffering.”

“Well, I think that’s Leon’s department,” Davies said.

“Your claim will be submitted to the arbitration committee, pending the resolution of investigations into the events of today,” Arnett said. “Under the terms of the student arbitration agreement, you have the right to forego arbitration and take the matter to court, though you must inform the committee of this in writing no less than thirty days in advance.”

“Thirty days?” I asked. “Just when is this arbitration going to happen?”

“Some time after the investigations have been completed,” Arnett said.

“These things do take time,” Davies said.

“Should I get a lawyer?” I asked. “And will I get the money for my knife and stuff now, or do I have to wait?”

“The arbitration committee will assign you an advocate. Additional legal representation is up to you,” Arnett said. “As for your knife and clothing, the university is prepared to admit responsibility for the loss of your possessions. If you’ll simply present an itemized list of each item and their value, you will receive full compensation in seven to ten business days.”

“You’ll take responsibility for vanishing my stuff, but not for sealing me in a room and dumping me into a deadly dungeon,” I said. “Nice.”

“A hasty judgment benefits nobody,” Davies said. “It’s better to do these things properly.”

“I’d like to see my friends now,” I said.

“Of course,” Davies said. She reached beneath her desk and produced a small card, which she pushed across the table. “Here’s a temporary ID. I’ll send a note to the registrar’s office not to charge you for a new one. We’ll put your weapons exemption in the system today, but give it until Monday until you have a new card made.”

“What about meals?” I asked. “And my room keys.”

“Your senior R.A. will have extra keys,” she said. “And that card’s been tied to your meal plan.”

“The arbitration committee will be sending you some papers to fill out,” Arnett said. “I suggest you be thorough. The more detail you can provide, the faster the matter can be resolved.”

Davies rose.

“Thank you, Leon,” she said. “If you don’t mind waiting here while I escort… Ms. Mackenzie… out, there’s a few things I’d like to discuss with you.”

“I can find my own way,” I said.

“Please, it’s the least I can do,” Davies said.

I found out the real reason when we got outside the double doors of her office. There was a small reception area, decorated in the same fashion but slightly better lit. The receptionist’s desk was vacant.

“I wanted to tell you… you don’t have to include the bit about the students threatening you when you fill out the report,” she said.

“Arnett said ‘be thorough’,” I said.

“This could ruin their lives,” she said.

“They would have done worse to me,” I said. “But you’re not thinking about their lives, you’re thinking about how it reflects on the university.”

“We all have our jobs to do,” she said. “I understand you want what’s coming to you… you deserve it… but you don’t need to go dragging in a lot of extraneous details. I promise you, you can still get the full compensation that you deserve without those parts.”

“You promise me? Can you put that in writing?” I asked.

“Of course not.”

“I’ll think about it,” I said, thinking about it.

I didn’t say anything else, but I didn’t have to think long.

The delvers had all been thinking in terms of human vs. non-human. Justin would have killed me if he thought I’d given a human up to the field, but he wouldn’t concern himself if it was a non-human. They’d all thought very little about the idea of me dying. If they didn’t suffer any consequences for their actions, that would make their impression correct.

If I had the power to do anything about that, I would.

“The hell she did!” Seth said.

“Come see,” Lacey said.

“What’s the big deal?” I said. “I can’t be the only one who’s ever made it through the farm.”

“No, but you’d be the first one to get the pitchfork out,” Riley said, approaching within a few feet and looking down at it. “Up close, it sure looks like it.

“What’s so hard about getting the pitchfork out?” I asked. “Don’t you need it to leave the farm?”

“You need it to open the gate,” Riley said. “But it won’t let itself be carried across the threshold, and most people wouldn’t want to, anyway, because of the curse.”

“What curse?” I asked.

“The one that gradually fills the wielder with a boundless killing rage,” Riley said.

“Uh, I’ve been carrying it around for most of the morning and I didn’t feel anything,” I said, picking up the implement. “And I can sense magic. This thing doesn’t have any.”

The boys all looked at Lacey.

“It’s the real one,” she said. “I could feel it when I went to touch it.”

“I don’t feel anything,” I said.

“Well, think of it this way,” Lacey said. “Can you feel your own skin?”

I gave her a puzzled look, then touched my arm to see if I could see what she was talking about.

“Yeah,” I said. “I can.”

“No, I mean, when you’re not doing that,” she said. “You don’t notice your own skin, your hair, your… well, your clothes… in the normal course of things. The pitchfork might be too close to your own personal energy signature for you to feel anything.”

“Anyway, at least that explains why you’re naked,” Riley said.

“What are you talking about?” I asked. Lacey had said something similar.

“You used your clothes to make a scarecrow,” Riley said. “Just like we did.”

“That thing was just your clothes?” I asked.

“And some hay,” Lacey said. “And the spirit of the previous person to assume the role, who doesn’t get to move on until another actual person takes their place, unfortunately for him. Or her.” I stared at her, dumbfounded. She laughed. “What, you don’t think you’re the only one who ever thought of that trick?”

“I didn’t,” I said. “I couldn’t have. I got dumped in the labyrinth naked.”

“Then… how did you get out when the scarecrow demanded payment?” Justin asked. There was something in his voice I couldn’t quite place. It had gone lower, but he wasn’t doing his affected Mighty Leader voice this time.

“I flamed up and threatened to burn the field,” I said. “The scarecrow had to let me go.”

“You can’t do that!” Seth said. “That’s cheating.”

“Why don’t you two go finish searching for loot?” Justin said to him and Lacey.

“Okay,” Seth said. “Just don’t steal my kill while my back’s turned.”

“The thing is… he’s right,” Justin said as the healer and the archer went off. “Threatening the scarecrow doesn’t work. Everybody tries it, but it can’t choose to forego payment.”

“But I didn’t,” I said. “I answered three questions and did a service for the scarecrow, which put the onus back on it.”

The two fighters exchanged glances.

“I guess that might work,” Riley said. “Though it does seem like it’s stretching the point a bit.”

“Well, how else do you think I got through it without any clothes?” I asked. Nobody answered. The looks on their faces had become grim. I noticed their hands were resting on their hilts.

“Were they human?” Justin asked.

“Was who human?”

“The one you sacrificed,” he said. “Was it one of your Harlowe friends, or was it a human?”

“I didn’t sacrifice anybody,” I said. “I was dropped in here alone… without preparation, and against my will.”

“So you did what you had to do,” Justin said. “Right.” He drew his sword. “Just like I’m about to.”

I tightened my grip on the pitchfork, but since I was sitting on the ground with an arrow sticking out of me, I’m not sure how intimidating a gesture it was.

“Hey, guys, come on,” Lacey said, running up. “Look at her. She’s not going to hurt anybody else. Let’s just go. There’s nothing here.”

“Hey, I’m not done searching,” Seth said. “They wouldn’t put hellhounds in here if they weren’t guarding something.”

“If she gave a human to the field, she has to die,” Justin said to Lacey, ignoring Seth.

“She probably will, anyway,” Lacey said. “Anyway, why would a human even be with her in the first place?”

“I didn’t kill anybody,” I said. “Besides, it’s not like no delving parties have ever sacrificed somebody at the farm before. You can’t tell me that everybody who ever stumbles into the farm works it out.”

“We actually found it on the ethernet,” Lacey said.

She giggled. Justin gave her a dirty look.

“If an honorable fellowship of adventurers loses a member in the course of events, it is but a regrettable part of life,” Justin said, laying it on thick again. “We have all known one who lost his life in the pursuit of glory.”

“Wait, we have?” Riley asked.

“Yeah, dude, there were like seven whole parties that were wiped out last year,” Justin said.

“But we didn’t know them,” Riley said. “Only one of them was freshmen.”

“Okay, but, remember that guy, Greenwalt or Greenberg or whatever?” Justin said. “Fell into the acid pit during midterms?”

“Yeah, but, we didn’t actually know him, either,” Riley said.

“He was in our class,” Justin said. “He was our brother. And there was the girl with the… with the tongue ring thing?”

“Oh, yeah, Misty,” Lacey said. “Or Mercy. Something. I liked her. Didn’t she make it?”

“She was eaten by a snake,” Justin said.

“The thing is, Just, when you say it like that, it makes it sound like we actually knew knew these people,” Riley said. “Like they were our friends or something.”

“I was kind of friends with Mercy,” Lacey said. “Marcy? That doesn’t sound right. I thought she’d made it.”

“I’m pretty sure she was eaten by a snake,” Justin said.

“Look,” I said. “I just got out of the healing center for overusing magic defending myself from a girl with more hair than brains. I really don’t want to throw a lot of power around. I really don’t want to hurt anybody. But the longer you stand around calmly—or kind of melodramatically—talking about killing me for something I didn’t do, the more sense it makes for me to just flood this place with fire and hope for the best.”

“Did you hear that?” Justin said. “She threatened us.”

“You’re threatening me!” I said. “I’m just telling you I’m going to defend myself if you attack me.”

“Nobody’s attacking her!” Seth said. “I’ll put another arrow in her if you want, but nobody’s taking credit for my demon kill.”

“If you kill me, it’s murder,” I said.

“Actually, it’s adventuring,” Riley said. He turned to Justin. “Come on, though, Lacey’s right. Bitch is already dead. Let’s just go.”

“If she’s got the pitchfork, she might make it out,” Justin said. “Do you want to take that risk?”

“It seems less risky than provoking a fight with somebody who can throw fire,” Riley said. “Lacey used up most of her juice after the hellhound ambush.”

“Please don’t refer to the power divine as ‘juice’,” Lacey said. “I’m sure Anankha would disapprove.”

“Ananka?” I said. “How can you begin to condone what this guy’s talking about doing if you follow a demigoddess of peace?”

“Hey, I’m not condoning anything!” Lacey said. “I said we should just leave you. And Anankha is a full goddess, thank you very much.”

“She’s the daughter of Lord Khersis in his mortal aspect and Khelaine,” I said. “One mortal parent, one divine. That’s a demigod.”

“Okay, but, Khersis was a god in the beginning,” Lacey said. “Just because he incarnated as mortal for a time…”

“The time during which your hippy-trippy demigoddess was conceived,” I said.

“You know, I don’t think I care for your attitude,” Lacey said, putting a hand on her hip. “I’m on your side here, you know.”

“Yeah, you’d rather leave me to die on my own than kill me,” I said. “I bet Ananka would be proud.”

“Well, if you’d rather do things Justin’s way…”

“Hey, neither of you are in charge here,” Justin said. “I am.”

This was about the point when the pain of the headache began to outweigh the pain of my injury.

“Seth,” I said.

“What?”

“Don’t talk to him,” Justin said. “Talk to me. I’m the party leader.”

“Do you get the same credit for defeating an opponent as you’d get for killing them?” I asked Seth.

“Uh, yeah,” he said. “But that hardly ever comes up, because what’s the point of defeating something and not killing them?”

“Summon your teacher,” I said. “I’ll tell him you defeated me. The credit for bringing down a half-demon has got to be worth failing one exercise.”

“Really?”

“Just as long as you don’t make me take you out to dinner,” I said, thinking of Sooni.

“What?”

“Never mind.”

“Hold on,” Riley said. “If he does that, we all fail.”

I could see the idea appealed to Seth.

“If you don’t, then Justin will kill me and he’ll get the credit,” I pointed out.

“Fuck that,” Seth said. “Professor! Emergency situation!”

“You little weasel!” Justin said.

An image of a white-haired man with a long beard appeared, floating a few inches above the ground. Dressed in purple robes, he looked very little like what I had pictured for a delving instructor. Well, I supposed that there was a lot of magic and lore involved in the trade, too.

He took in the scene with a glance.

“Oh, my, you’ve managed to pick up wounded,” he said. “Ms. Beaumont, is this beyond your abilities?”

“I’m afraid that it sort of is, sir,” Lacey said. “She’s a demon.”

“A d… oh, my! There was some sort of memo… is that about you, my dear?”

“Um, possibly,” I said. It seemed the safest way to go. “What did it say?”

“That you’d gone missing or something,” he said. “You didn’t just wander in to have a look around, did you? We post those signs for a reason!”

“It was a teleportation problem,” I said.

“Are you in… imminent peril?” he asked, turning to Justin. Maybe that was where Justin got it from.

“No, sir,” Justin said, a little sullenly.

“Don’t move,” he said. “Stay with her. I have to alert the chancellor before I come through. ”

He faded out.

“The chancellor?” Lacey repeated, giving me a sidelong look.

I shrugged. Note to people with arrows in their shoulders: don’t shrug.

“We have a chancellor?” Riley asked.

“She spoke at the memorial breakfast at the end of term, remember?” Justin said.

“I remember the omelets station,” Riley said. “I didn’t pay attention to the speakers.”

“Why would the chancellor be interested in you?” Lacey asked.

“I don’t know,” I said. “I’ve never met her.”

The professor in the purple robes appeared, solid and tangible this time. I think he came through in a hurry, because he was facing the wrong direction and stumbled a bit before turning around to face me. He was holding a big piece of cloth and a long silver rod.

“I’m terribly sorry to keep you waiting, my dear, but I had to alert the proper authorities and find a charged healing device at the same time,” he said. He knelt down on the grass beside me, laying the silver rod down and handing me what turned out to be a large tunic. “You can cover yourself up with this while I tend your wound. The arrow’s going to have to come out first, I’m afraid.”

“Uh, Professor Smith,” Justin said. The name jarred a bit. It didn’t fit the old man’s wizardly image. “I know that normally interrupting a crawl like this results in…”

“Oh, don’t worry,” the professor said. “Extraordinary circumstances, my boy. You’re to be commended. I think you made the right decision, taking the hero track. Anybody can raid a catacomb, but very rare is the man who…”

“It was Seth’s idea to get you,” I said, shooting Justin a venomous glance outside the Professor’s vision.

“Was it? Indeed, it looks like Mr. Stuart’s arrow, as well,” the professor said. “Ah, well. It’s a big man that redeems his mistakes.”

“I can still have credit for defeating her, before we knew who she was, right?” Seth asked.

“Defeating? If this had been a real threat, she would have killed you before you got off another arrow,” Smith said. He poked a finger at the wound. I cried out. “Sorry. Hmm.”

“But the first one would have killed her eventually,” Seth insisted.

“Probably,” Smith said. “Eventually. I’ve seen men die from less, but that wouldn’t help you much.” He took a leather pouch and a small silver knife from his belt and held it up. I cringed and shrank back. “Please remain quite still, Miss Mackenzie. The barbs are lodged in your flesh. I’m going to have to cut it out.” He handed me the pouch. “You may wish to bite down on this.”

I put it in my mouth. The feeling of foolishness helped me feel a little less afraid, anyway. The professor helped me lay back, and I closed my eyes.

The pain was… well, I can’t describe it. It was more pain than I’d ever experienced, except maybe when being signed at repeatedly the previous weekend, and this pain was a lot more… real. Tangible. My joints all locked up and I bit down on the leather hard.

It was over very quickly, though, and before I’d even fully registered that, the pain vanished along with the wound. I’d bitten almost clean through the leather.

“You can put that tunic on now,” Professor Smith said. “Gentlemen, avert your eyes! Have you honestly been gawking at this young lady the whole time? You could have come up with a shirt and pants among yourselves.”

“She’s actually kind of an exhibitionist,” Lacey said.

The professor wasn’t listening, though. His eyes had fallen to the pitchfork.

“Is that…? Well, I suppose we can cross the farm off the list of dangerous encounters now,” he said. “I suspect the solution’s already been leaked, anyway. You should bring that along. Old delving rule, you know.”

“What rule?” I asked, picking up the pitchfork.

“Finders keepers,” he said. “Now take my hand and we’ll be off.”

“I don’t know if I’m up for teleport magic at the moment,” I said. “Can’t we take a shortcut out?”

“We’re at least three hours from an exit by any path, but don’t worry… nobody gates directly into or out of the labyrinth on purpose,” he said. “We’ll be going the long way, comparatively speaking. Please, take my hand.”

I did, and everybody else began to become translucent, the way Professor Smith himself had when he’d first appeared. The environs of the labyrinth turned gray and then faded out, and it was just the two of us in an infinite indistinct space.

“Don’t let go of my hand,” the professor said. “We don’t want to go losing you again. You have some very loyal friends, miss. They’ve been sitting in the lobby of the administrative building since half past eight.”

I smiled.

“I’m not that surprised,” I said, picturing Steff, Amaranth, and Two. Maybe Celia, too. She seemed like the type to jump at a chance to protest.

“Makes me glad I don’t go over there that often,” he said. “Apparently, sixty or seventy people can make quite a disruption.”

“What?” I repeated. Seventy people? He had to have heard wrong… probably the story had grown in the telling. There were only twenty-five people on my floor and most of them hated me.

“Now, we’re heading straight for Chancellor Davies’s office,” he said. “One of the, ah, ringleaders of the little protest is your roommate, and she’s been sent to fetch you clothes.”

“Was she told to get my clothes or to get clothes for me?” I asked, picturing myself in a puffy sweater and jeans with spangles or sequins on the seat.

“I really couldn’t say,” he said. “Hold on. I think we’re just… about… there.”